Monday, September 24, 2012

The Bushwick Painkiller

I've only been 26 for a few months now but I'm already starting to feel old. Not aged in the sense of realizing that I'm older than most people at the bars in Williamsburg or as a result from some looming social pressure that's telling me I should have my life together by now. But rather, old in the sense that my stupid body takes forever to get over a night of cheap tequila shots, PBRs, and awkward creative dance moves. I'm not sure if it's because 26-year-olds probably shouldn't still be partying like they're a freshman in college or that my body is actually not able to detox from the copious amounts of poison that I've been putting into it, but something has definitely changed and it's making me rethink those cheap beer shot combos.

A few years ago, my mornings were a lot different. I'd wake up, still drunk from the night before and be eagerly ready to take on the day, even with smeared mascara streaking my face. Brunches at the Metropolitan White Castle, while still in my clothes from the previous night didn't phase me. In fact, while my friends and I were busy downing mini cheeseburgers, chugging cherry coke, and categorizing our friends as either cats or dogs (think about it) I realized something very important - I come up with my best material when I'm minus a few vital brain cells. But I'm quickly realizing that I'm not so hilarious when I'm hungover these days. It's actually kind of depressing.

As I once thrived in my fuzzed out state, I now am a pathetic mess that pitifully texts my roommates "death" which translates as "puhhhlleeasseeeee may I have a bottle of Mexican coke, saltines, advil, and a hug". I'm super lucky that they usually deliver because with their help, I can usually make it out of bed by 1pm without booting. But sometimes I'm the one that receives the suffer-texts and when I get those, I go to great lengths to repay their generosity. That's how this ridiculously insane sandwich was born. That and after staying up really late and watching the Food Network's segment on the Grilled Cheese Truck's fried chicken and waffle sandwich. I think I even dreamt about it that night to be honest.